Last week, I put on my facebook page a phrase I had been pondering on: Let me be your muse.

And as always, word proves to be more bond than James, because a few days later, Fahamu sends me an email to let me know he’d like for me to play a part in his art show, the Fa’ktry, a play off of Andy Warhol’s studio, the Factory. He says he’d like for me to play his Edie, Andy Warhol’s muse. I thought, wow, how timely is that.

Just to provide a little background, the Edie Sedgwick was an actress, model, socialite, and heiress. She came to New York to find herself, and was discovered by Warhol shortly after her arrival. She was known as “Warhol’s Superstar”, acting in a series of movies the inseparable duo created together.

” I just want to turn my world on, just for a moment. Just for a moment.”

As infamous as she is, I was never particularly drawn to research or look into Edie Sedgwick’s life until now. It’s interesting that I’m discovering her at a time when I’m also just arriving in New York City to find myself, chasing a dream I’m so dedicated to manifest…

(above: Siena Miller playing Edie Sedgwick in “Factory Girl”.)

Undeniably, she was a superstar. She was often called a “beautiful creature”: young, gorgeous, glamorous, and named girl of the year in 1965. Everyone wanted to be her. Yet, her life was so troubled. So many wanted to be in her spotlight, and she was adored by so many, but her family life was fractured, disfunctional, unloving. She died at the tragic age of 28, preceded by a downward spiral of drugs & alcohol, and a relationship gone sour with Warhol.

So why am I talking about all of this? Because knowing Edie made me realize how thankful I am that I know myself. I came to New York City with a dream, and I know that getting to that dream without losing my mind would require me to be strong, patient, grounded, loving ,to myself and others. To be famous? Admittedly, yeah, maybe. But famous for the sake of being famous is what makes the chase so dangerous. Fame itself is not what I want. Purpose is.

Reading the recent Asian American Spoken Word Summit blog, it made me feel so thankful (and also very, very sad that I couldn’t be back in the Bay this summer to be a part of it) that I have people around my circle who are filled with positivity, a dedication to their community, a collective purpose to create change. My dreams involve being a strong representation for my community, a community so beautiful and radiant that I feel the entire world deserves a glimpse into it. My dreams involve creating inspiration, shedding light, helping and empowering others. Without this, the chase would be pointless, and so would the idea of fame…

Edie in fact, was a beautiful creature. She was an artist. Wealthy, too.  I don’t believe she lacked purpose, but her troubled past led her to a life that seemed so sad… Moving to New York and watching so many people run a rat rase to chase money makes me feel so sad inside. Clearly, while money solves many problems, it won’t save your life when you need. I’m thankful to be rich in the relationships I have with my family, friends, community. As hard as life is, that’s the kind of abundance that we all really need.

Now here’s my dear friend Danny, live from the Bay Area, introducing the just passed APIA Summit in one of the most beautiful landscapes ever. Oh, I love my peoples. I love you Dandiggity!!

And please, join myself, Fahamu Pecou, Hebru Brantley, and others for a week long art installment at the LYON WEIR Gallery in Chelsea this week. Info is in the blog post below. Hope to see you!